2018 💫

Happy New Year!

How have you been my lovely people? Yes, I know it’s been three weeks since I last posted. I am sorry for disappearing on you guys but I needed to take the Pause. I must admit though, I missed this space.

Anyway, it’s finally 2018 and I am so happy 2017 is over and done with. No hard feelings. It was a wonderful time to grow, to learn, to stretch and to heal. It was also a difficult year for them that lost loved ones and it saddens me that we lost a lot of young people. However, I believe that we can make a difference in 2018. We may not have control over who goes at what time but what we are able to live above the issues of life. We have the Greater One within us and we have the power to declare life into our circumstances.

It’s at this time of the year that the word and vision of the year will be released. In churches, in companies and other different spheres of life. It’s a wonderful thing. However, I have been asking myself, do I have a personal word from God about this new year? What season am I in? What is expected of me? How far am I supposed to go? 

I believe that when you seek for something you will ultimately find it. But how can you get what you’re not looking for? I don’t know where you started your New Year. You probably went to an overnight to crossover. I did too. A word was released. A prophecy for the new year. You got excited at what God has said He will do. That’s wonderful. I mean, you could have been anywhere else but you decided to start the new season in His Presence. 👏👏

How amazing it is that your theme is ‘ A Year of Favor ‘ (this is just random). But as long as you cannot grasp the deeper meaning of that word, you will never see it’s manifestion to the fullness. You’ll get sparks ✨ instead of the flame 🔥. It’s not enough that your church has a theme for the year. There’s a lot more that God desires to show and tell you but how can He if you’re not properly positioned? Waiting on Him. In the secret place. 

I believe that the theme you get in church should be a confirmation of what God already told you. Own the Word. Proclaim it. Work towards it. 

If people can’t see what God is doing, they stumble all over themselves, but when they attend to what He reveals, they are most blessed. 

Proverbs 29.18 (MSG)

Where there is no word from God, people are uncontrolled. But those who obey what they have been taught are happy. 

Proverbs 29.18 (ICB) 

I hope you already had time to take stock. If not please do so NOW. And while you’re at it, write down your goals. Spiritual, Financial, Health, Education, Career and yes, even Character. How far do you envision yourself?  It’s good to have a word but are there strategies that you’ve put together in order to achieve?

Don’t be a vagabond this year. Know what you want and go for it. Have weekly and monthly goals. Have a word daily, weekly, monthly. Narrow down your focus to what really matters. And while you’re at it Pause. Reflect

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Musings 😳

Happy New Month!! 

What a time to be alive. It’s the most beautiful time of the year. 

Today’s post is a personal note from the Holy Spirit to all of us. I had initially started out on another topic but He took over. How happy am I that He did because He just confirmed the theme of this month – The month of the Holy Spirit. How I pray that we would know Him deeply in this season. 

I took a bus to town the other day and being that I didn’t want to be late, I got into the first bus that came. A short while later after we had gotten on the highway, I took my phone from my bag so as to catch up with what had happened during the day. 

It was then that the Holy Spirit brought my attention to the issue at hand. He asked a simple question. If you can trust a bus driver you don’t know to take you to your destination how much more am I capable of? Why do you find it difficult to trust me? I was puzzled to say the least when He asked that. I questioned why He would tell me that. It was then that the veil was removed and deplorable state of my heart was exposed. A heart full of worry, doubt, wonder and fear. 

It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in humans. 

Psalms 118.8

Sometimes I struggle. Yes. I struggle to believe. I struggle to perceive what He is doing. Sometimes, I fight doubt in my mind as I openly declare a statement of faith over something that’s just wishful thinking. I know you do too. Or atleast you have before. It’s a bad place to be in but it reveals one thing – Misplaced Trust. 

I know. What a warped perception? But before you judge me, do some in-house assessment. Who is the first person that comes to mind when you’re happy? What about when you’re facing challenges? If your genuine answer is not God in both then you have no legal ground to form a perception about me. The least you could do is realize that like me you need help. Help that can only be given by the Holy Spirit.

We have quenched Him so many times. We have erected walls to keep Him from accessing us. We have imposed our disappointment from man on the precious Holy Spirit. We have built walls out of the pain or betrayal. We have believed in a lie – that it will happen again. But it will not. Just because things don’t look progressive in our eyes doesn’t mean nothing happens when we trust Him. We were meant to walk by faith not sight. So that means our physical eyes are blind to what is happening but the eyes of our understanding are open to see, right? 

I am super grateful that He asked me that. This goes to show that there’s stuff I was carrying that’s not mine but His. I am glad that He brought my attention to that to show me that He loves me and is willing to help me. However, He requires my pure, humble and innocent surrender. To fully understand that He is well able to carry me. To take me to my purpose. Irrespective of the hurdles, He is working things in my favor. He only asks one thing, that I would realize that we are working on His timezone. 

The Lord is trustworthy in all He promises and faithful in all He does. 

Psalms 145.13(b)

What I love about that is that He’s taking me where He has been. He is Alpha and Omega. He works from end to beginning. And that simply assures me that I am in good hands. 

Don’t let the Holy Spirit fight for your attention because you are distracted by material things. Those are just but tools to get you where you need to be but He is the key. He holds the mystery that has the ability to catapult you to your next level. Let Him have you. Body, soul and Spirit.

You have not lived until in complete surrender you are given to Him. Give your Yes to Him. Don’t just get born again, but let Him have the parts of you that you don’t like. I promise you, He can handle it all. 

 

Stay Positive!! 

Has your back ever been against the wall and all seemed like it was over? I have been in such a situation. And honestly, it’s not pretty. Everytime I get to a place like this, I am reminded of my mum’s words – Nothing good comes from a place that looks good. 

So what’s the key when you find yourself in a situation that looks like an impossibility? Hope 

Google defines hope as: 

  • Noun – A feeling of expectation and desire for a particular thing to a happen. A feeling of trust
  • Verb – A feeling of trust

But I beg to differ, I think hope is more than a feeling. Defining it as an emotion would mean that you are just wishing and waiting. In other words, you want something to happen or be. Hope is not wishful thinking. Hope is certainty. Hope is an anchor of the soul. Hope makes all things work. 

The Bible defines faith as the substance of things hoped for. So you cannot believe if you are not firmly convicted. Looking at Hebrews 11 as a case study, you will see that indeed hope is a knowledge of facts. 

And by faith even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered him faithful who had made the promise. 

Hebrews 11.11 NIV

Sarah was able to have her child because she was aware of an attribute of God – Faithfulness. Hope is like land. It looks good on the surface and promises much but unless you are willing to do the work – to till the land, you will never know how much worth is found there. Hope is something you constantly work on. Like character, it needs to be developed. 

I believe that most of the people if not all, at one point have been in the place of wishful thinking and termed it as hope. How do I know this? Look at the expression on their faces when they say they are hoping for a better tomorrow. Or better yet, the tone of their voice. It reveals one thing – timidity. 

They are not even sure that what they are anticipating for will come to be. 

There is always if somewhere in the statements they make. When things don’t happen as desired or the situation gets more difficult, their hope is postponed. 

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life. 

Proverbs 13.12 NIV 

As long you defer it, you’ll grow weary, that’s how people get stressed. You can only put off your hope if you don’t know who you are and what you have. Show me your source and I’ll tell you if what you define as hope is certainty or assumption.

Only three things remain

I pray that we may endeavour to access this realm of hope where it’s more of surety than possibility. Is He not able to do immeasurably more than we ask or imagine? Be encouraged, the storm will not destroy you. It’s only meant to wash you clean. 

May this song encourage you to continue holding on Brian Courtney Wilson – I’ll just say Yes 

Love and blessings,

X

Just be Held!! 

Hello 😊
My title today is inspired by a song that I love by Casting Crowns that happens to be speaking to me a lot in this season. It basically talks about surrendering to God in the midst of your Storm instead of trying to work things out yourself.

As I pondered over the lyrics of this song, I figured we are only one step away from freedom. It requires us to rely on God. How?  Let’s look at what the chorus says;

So when you’re on your knees and answers seem so far away, stop holding on and just be held

Your world’s not falling apart, it’s falling into place, I’m on the Throne, stop holding on and just be held

To hold someone or something means to have and keep in your hands. The word have can be used in several illustrations to bring out different meanings. In this particular case, we’ll use have to mean possess. So if God is telling us to stop holding on and just be held, He’s simply asking us to stop keeping ourselves.

What is it that has you? What is it that you feed people? What is it that you are full of? Better yet, what is that you are empty of? You yield what is sown in you. You cannot reap love from a field that you sowed hatred.

Make a tree good and it’s fruit will be good, or make a tree bad and it’s fruit will be bad, for a tree is recognised by its fruit.

A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in him, and an evil stored up in him.

Matthew 12.33, 35

Your produce is relative to your source.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self control. Against such things there is no law.

Galatians 5.22-23

For this kind of fruit to be produced in us, it requires that the flesh may be put to death. When you are in the flesh, you are keeping yourself. You try to produce Your Own love, patience, humility etc. This only leads to frustration because in your human nature it is not possible to love. You are only able to love another individual genuinely because God first loved you and His love is at work in you.

Have you ever disliked someone so much but you pretend to love and care about them when you are in the public? Your intentions may have been good as you started out but later you realize that none of that actually existed and all you have is envy. As long as you continue to keep yourself, you’ll burn out. You can only give what you have. That which you tried to coat in candy before others shall become as poison that kills you slowly.

Always examine your motives in everything you do. What taste do you leave in the mouth of people? Bitter? Sweet and Sour?

When you hold a small baby in your hands, you’ll realize that the warmth that is concentrated on its tiny body is rubbing off on you. Imagine then what it’s like for God to hold you. He takes in what it is that your body is emitting – which is extremely cold. In exchange for a bad attitude He gives you His gentleness. He can’t take away your persona unless you’re willing to let it go and give it to Him.

He is a gentleman that is well schooled in etiquette.

Your demeanor speaks volumes about you more than your words ever will. It is what see, not what you try to show us.

Take sometime this week to re-dedicate yourself to Him. Stop holding on to the ashes, give them to Him and watch Him beautify you.

In case you haven’t listened to the song, here’s the link Just be Held – Casting Crowns 

Blessed Week

Xx

The Sun Will Rise ⛅

Change is inevitable, they taught me in school. But sometimes, I wish it was. Don’t you? Given an opportunity to choose, there are parts of my life that wouldn’t make it back to reality. The stormy parts.⚡⚡I mean, who would choose a storm over sunshine?

Storms come to us in different forms. Some affect your health, others your finances and yes, even your emotions are a potential target. These areas of life aren’t exactly for the public domain. So it’s safe to say these are secret storms. 

As long as the earth endures, seedtime and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night will never cease.
Genesis 8.22

Recently, I was watching a documentary on eagles and I must admit that I learnt so much. The one thing that stood out for me was their ability to ride on a storm. They didn’t run for safety like other birds but they longed to be lifted to a higher altitude by the wind of the storm. All they needed to do was be alert and focused. They didn’t need to flap their wings but simply to glide and rest as they rode above the clouds. It’s interesting that for one group, it’s a matter of life and death whereas for the other group it’s a matter of growth.

Its in order to say that eagles love storms. These birds have within them the ability to face any kind of threat without holding back. How much more we who are God’s children? Unfortunately, many times we cower in the midst of battle. We allow ourselves to be intimidated by a simple problem that we have magnified in our minds.

You, dear children, are from God and have overcome them, because the one who is in you is greater than the one who is in the world.

1 John 4.4

Its in difficult situations that you realize the power of your inner man. Storms have the power to awaken the inner man to fight for a better tomorrow. You grow without realizing it. It often seems as though there is no progress but that’s not true. Your character is developed in such times. You can’t see in a storm because you’re supposed to be walking by faith and not by sight.

When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze.

Isaiah 43.2

If my understanding of this scripture is correct, then that means storms are guaranteed. You will encounter watery storms with the ability to overwhelm you and equally fiery storms with the ability to consume you. Yet in both, God promises that He will be with you. The storm in your life doesn’t negate the Presence of God.

It’s in the storm that things are tested in the fire and only that which is genuine shall stand. You want a blessing that no eye has seen nor ear heard? Then be prepared. It doesn’t just happen. This is not magic. He is a God of order. A God who believes in the process because within it there is a purpose. Your faith cannot be trusted until it’s tested. We are like gold that is refined seven times in the furnace till its at the purest form.

You have to be ready for what youre receiving as a blessing. If youre not, then it will destroy you. There is a reason why youre going through whatever youre going through. Did you see that word? Going Through. Its a process

A process that purifies and edifies you. A process that raises and lifts you to stand taller than you ever have. Yes, I know everyone has turned against you. But can’t you see it? They are actually pushing you deeper into the place of prayer. The deeper you go, the higher the lifting.

Storms teach us to fight our battles in prayer. They teach us to find our bearing in the Word of God. If you desire to see positive results, don’t try to flap when you could glide and rest as the wind carries you. I’m not saying do nothing. I’m simply saying, don’t rely on yourself. Don’t rely on what worked before but like a child, allow your trust and faith to be molded. Decide today to be like the eagle and thrive in the midst of the Storm.

Every cloud has a silver lining!!

It’s raining, are you warm inside? ☔ 

If I asked you to describe yourself in one word, what would it be? Second question, where did you get the revelation of the person you have described yourself as? 

Have you ever taken a photo on your phone and the first thought that came to mind was a question – Will they like it? We are in a digital era where people look to be authenticated because of their active social media pages that command a huge following. We have summarized this theory as; more likes and followers equates to approval. As a result we have seen people go to all sorts of extremes just to get noticed. We have narrowed down our worth to center on what people think about us. 

I know of people who have it all – money, fame, power, people at their beck and call etc but deep down they are lonely souls. This leads me to ask, whose audience are you living for? When you live for people and what they say, then you are doing yourself a great dis-service. Deep within us all, there is a void. A void that cannot be filled by material things but by one person who rarely catches our attention yet He considers us so dear to Him. 

– for whoever touches you touches the apple of His eye –

Zechariah 2.8 (b) 

When you live looking for validation and acceptance from human beings, you will die early. Why? No human being has the power to complete another. We have been graced to compliment each other but completion comes from God. 

How you define yourself speaks volumes about your source. These days, we have squads #squadgoals but do you really take time to ask yourself what you think of you  without the validation you receive from your clique. Most people hide in groups because that’s like a safe place for them. Knowingly or unknowingly, they have something about them that they don’t want to confront as its much easier to go with the flow, right? Its never that serious they say

You have to summon yourself to a meeting and ask very critical questions. Who am I? Endeavor to find out why you have a void. What is its purpose? Where did it come from? 

Beloved, I don’t know what you believe in but I believe in God. I am at a place where He is no longer just the maker of heaven and earth. He is my Father and that means I have His divine DNA. If I need affirmation, I run to Him. If I need endorsement, I run to Him. He is the Creator, I am the product. He had a purpose in mind when He put me together. Therefore, I need to go back to Him to get the manual to find out who I am and how I should function.

Until you come to the realization that your worth can only be found in Him then you will never live an accomplished life. 

For in Him we live and move and have our being. As some of your own poets have said, ‘We are His offspring.’

Acts 17.28

For how long will you get rained on? Every single time you’re left frustrated cause you stand in the rain of validation, the rain of attention. Do you see how temporary it is? It falls on you – You get the attention that you crave, then you drip – it begins to fade, the rain stops – the validation has an expiry date. In no time, you dry up. You are weak. Barely able to get back on your feet again. What you thought would lift you is actually leading you to self destruction. 

Brain Freeze 😱😱 What’s going on here? 

Looking for their acceptance was a misdiagnosis of what is really ailing you. Do you see what has happened to you? You have believed in a lie. That you need people’s opinions to progress and be happy. As my Father in the Lord would ask, Who Told You? Who told you that you are worthless? Who told you that you need to look for attention?

You have given your mantle to them 💆 that they may legislate on your behalf. Don’t be surprised when they start using your own mantle to destroy you. 💇

Are you willing to be warm and whole? Then you need to take shelter when others go running into the rain. Take shelter in the Rock of Ages. Hide in Him in all seasons. Only then will you become warm inside out. Let His voice tell you a different narrative from what you have been exposed to. 

But you are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of Him who called you out of darkness into His wonderful light.

1 Peter 2.9

In my church, the theme for this month is Divine Fulfillment. However, you cannot be fulfilled in your relationships, career, finances and in other spheres until you are fulfilled in Him. It all comes down to this. Do you know Him? Is He your Source?

But seek first His kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well. 

Mathew 6.33

I love a song by Shana Wilson that says Give me You, everything else can wait. 

Let that be your cry this month. For more of Him. The more you know Him the more you will know yourself. Let us work towards being fulfilled in Him. 

As I pen off, I would like to appreciate the lovely lady who gave me this topic –its raining are you warm inside? Her name is Leah. I hope I did justice to it. Also, I take this opportunity to say thank you to each of you who reads this blog. Thank You for journeying with me through my thoughts

Happy New Month !!

Pain and Purpose II

Hello 😊
As promised, this is a continuation of last week’s article about pain. In case you haven’t read it yet, you can find it here

Disclaimer : Todays post is pretty long 😁

There is another aspect of pain. This kind of pain, we try to disguise. It’s the one with scars running deep that we are ashamed of. It’s funny how good we are at pretending to be whole on the outside yet deep inside by the minute we shatter like glass.

I have a scar on my face, just beneath my right eye on my cheek. For as long as I can remember, I was ashamed of it. I did not like that part of my face because I felt like it made me ugly. As I grew up, I developed a defence mechanism. I would style my hair in a way that would always hide the scar.

It so happened that at the last minute before my mum gave birth to me, I turned, the doctor said. The only way that they could get me out was by having a C Section performed on my mum. But there was a risk involved. There was a possibility that one of us wouldn’t make it. So they did what they knew best at the moment and fortunately, I got cut beneath the eye.

Yes, fortunately. If not, who knows what would have happened. I may have the scar, but my mum had both the pain and the scar at the same time. Her wound was very big and it took her a while before she could get up and about without help.

So where am I going with this? My story reveals two characters. 

•My mum – who despite the pain and the scar, never tried to beautify her pain and pretend. She embraced her process. She looked at the bright side. She was alive, so was her child and both were in good health. And as at right now, she has no scar whatsoever.

•Me – I may not remember the pain but I have a scar. From the scar, I opened a door. I sought approval. For so long in my life I struggled with low self esteem but I rarely let anyone see it. I gave pain power that it didn’t have. I chose what to show people and in an effort to pretend all was well, I got hurt so many times by what people said and thought of me. It depressed me. 

Here’s what I realized though, prior to seeking approval, I had already passed a vote of No confidence in myself. The low self esteem, was conceived as a result of what I thought about me. I meditated on the possibility that others might not accept me and in turn wounded my own heart. So now, I had an internal wound that was unexplainably painful and a physical scar which obviously was a healed wound.

I tried to sell fake to others but there were those that later discovered that there was more than what lay on the surface. Unfortunately, they didn’t know how to unearth the real so their words that exposed the pretence did more harm than good. How? Their purpose was to expose and not correct. They didn’t do it in love because if they did, there would be healing, right? Doesn’t love cover a multitude of sin? But how could they love a person who didn’t love herself? 

I didn’t guard my heart. I let their words get to me. I constantly replayed them in my mind like scenes from a favorite movie. And before I knew it, I had touched a wound that wasn’t healed so it got infected. 

These two characters represent two kinds of people going through similar circumstances. 

The first one experiences more pain than the other but remains optimistic and focused on the purpose of the pain. Hence, providing a good environment that supports healing. Whereas, the second one experiences only a fraction of the pain that the first person went through but develops negativity and self pity out of something others may never even notice. 

Which one are you?

Are you like me? In so much pain but you can’t even expose it and you just keep covering it up? Unfortunately, that only makes it worse. Your wound swells up. It becomes so sore that you can’t even look at it leave alone touch it. 

The worst thing about it is that you can only conceal it for so long. Sooner or later, the cat will be out of the bag. You’ll inflict your pain on others. Isn’t there a saying, hurt people hurt people? It will manifest in your speech, in your character and in how you treat people. 

Before you know it, you’ll become so bitter. You will always point fingers at others yet the problem is within. 

Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?

Luke 6.41

It has happened in my life. I have hurt people out of my pain. I was looking for love and approval from all the wrong places.

People.

I was so focused on pursuing people that I became blind to the one who was always there. He stuck by me giving me strength when I could even comprehend how deep I had drowned myself in pain. It took the wounds for me to awaken to His Presence that was and is always there. It took pain for me to see I had such a warped perception of God.

I related with Him from the pain I gave and got from people. I subconsciously thought He too, was like all of them. I would trust Him with limits. In vain, I tried to beautify myself yet He had the make up kit in His hand. He just wanted a chance to put me together but I would have none of it. Being such a gentleman, He didn’t impose Himself on me. He continued reassuring me even when I wasn’t even looking to Him. 

It took losing all friends to see the damage. I couldn’t get myself out of the pit that I had dug. He was my only hope. With reservation, I partly opened a door for Him. He surrounded me with people who radiated nothing but His love and for once in my life, I felt truly loved and sincerely appreciated. Even so, I questioned His motive. When He said He loved me, I didn’t believe Him. I would go to church and the worship leader would tell the congregation to profess their love for Him and I would keep quiet and wonder. And when I said it, I questioned myself and found out that I didn’t love Him. Atleast not sincerely.

I had not yet dealt with the layers of pain that I had accumulated over time. I longed for what others had with Him but the tree of pain had developed such firm roots in my heart and I wasn’t willing to go through the pain of having them uprooted. But there is something about the purity of His Love and what it can do. Gradually, I opened up. I learnt that with Him, there’s no room for pretence. He already knows the situation at hand and He desires to help you but only if you allow Him to.

What’s my current state you ask? I am a whole lot lighter on the inside by God’s grace. I am a work in progress.

All the same, it comes down to the fact that pain will always have two sides. The positive and the negative. And both, have a purpose. But the choice is yours. You can either go through or grow through pain.  The most powerful people I believe, are the ones who choose to remain focused and full of hope of a brighter day in the midst of the Storm. They find purpose in their difficult seasons. 

From which angle have you been operating from? That explains the results you’re seeing today. There’s so much to say about this but it all amounts to your perspective.

What you don’t deal with now, will destroy you tomorrow. Deal with pain from the root.